Stuff... and thanks

First, the thanks, because I've been running around like a headless chicken and honestly don't have enough time to answer comments.

HUGE THANK YOUS to everyone who commented on my last post (the one about my Dad). Your words of comfort and your sympathies truly made things easier and I adore each and every one of you for taking the time and for caring.

Dad's still hanging in there (he always was a stubborn one), but it looks like it won't be too much longer. They're giving him small doses of morphine to ensure that his pain is minimal.

And now, on to 'stuff'.

There's been some craziness with LJ somehow misassigning (?) affiliate referral compensations from Amazon. There is some talk that this issue has been resolved but I've not heard anything definitive.

I only bring this up because elisa_rolle was one of the people affected by this 'mistake' and posted about it on her LJ here:

Elisa is a strong supporter of the GLBT community, posting reviews of books, movies, artists and pretty much anything with a gay slant to it. She's absolutely a champion for gay rights, internationally (as she is from and lives in Italy).

I'm sure most of my flist knows about this already, but for those that don't, please click the link and comment to show your support.

And that's it, people. I'm sorry I don't have more to say right now.

I'll likely be a bit more active once things with my Dad are done, one way or the other. Until then... like I said, MANY thanks to everyone who offered comfort. I'll offer and update when I have one to give.

Be good to each other.


Oh, and for today's random bit of weirdness (because it wouldn't be my life without a little strange)...

I was at Mum's earlier. She was in the kitchen feeding the cat.

I sneezed.

She jumped and nearly fell over.

She said (I shit you not): "You scared me when you sneezed! I thought I'd stepped on the cat!"

So either the cat sounds like she's sneezing when Mum steps on her... or my sneezes sound like an angry and in-pain cat.

I'm not sure which option is less disturbing.

Oh, the drama...

... and in this one case, I can't even say the drama isn't real. *sighs*

Okay, most of you who are here on my LJ are people who didn't know me until I started writing professionally. And at the risk of outing myself (which I've likely done about a thousand times already), I used to write fan fic.

Why am I mentioning this? Well, mostly because i don't feel like retyping what I already wrote on my other (fan-ficcy) LJ, just about 4 years ago.

Why am I mentioning this NOW? Because my Dad, whom I rarely mention, seems to be dying.

I don't avoid mentioning him because there was anything bad about him as a father. He was a great Dad and he was always there for me, supportive and as loving as he was capable of being. Yes, sometimes I felt like I'd disappointed him, but in the end, I know that all he wanted was for me to be happy. We just had very different ideas of what happiness meant for me.

Well, in any case... I wrote THIS, not so long after Dad's "accident".

Now, Dad has double pneumonia and the doctors/nurses don't think he'll last more than three to five days.

On the one hand, it's horrible because he's my Dad and I love him... but on the other, he hasn't been my Dad -- on the inside -- in almost 4 years. The man he was just isn't there. He hasn't recognized me or Satan (my brother) since, and I'm not sure he even knows who Mum is.

He's not in any pain. He's not even awake. They have him on oxygen and fluids, but we've asked that no extraordinary measures be taken because he wouldn't want that.

My gut instinct and my deeper feelings tell me that this is a good thing. That Dad wouldn't want to go on as a vegetable, which is the likelihood, considering the high temperature he's running and the state of his mind prior. My worst nightmare is that he's been trapped inside his body for the last four years, aware but unable to respond.

Either way, I feel like things would be better for everyone if Dad's body gives out from this infection. And that has me feeling filthy in a way I can't even describe.

It's not that I WANT my Daddy to die. But he pretty much died four years ago, really. I guess I'm just waiting for the body to catch up with the spirit.

I feel like a ghoul. I feel like a bitch. I feel... lost, here.

I probably won't be posting again for a while. It's still possible that he might rally. Either way, I'm likely to be caught up in other things for the next little while.

Be good to each other, my flist.


One & One series

Just a quick post to say that the third book in the One & One series, "The One That Stayed", released today at Torquere and can be found HERE!

This one tells the story of David and Russell, how they met, their lives together, and what happens when someone tries to end all that.

I hope thos of you who are interested enough to get the book will find it a good read! *hee*


EXCITED!!! *flaily-dance*

Subject line pretty much says it all. Tis is EXCITED! For TWO reasons! *hee*

Firstly, as many of you may know, my first book with Total-E-Bound, A Game of Chances, is going to be released on the 22nd, and yes, that's exciting, in and of itself. HOWEVER!!! In an additional flaily-hands-dance inducing bit of woo-hoo, I've also been informed that the same book will be released IN PRINT in March!

Yes, I'm dorking out, here, but I've not been in print before (aside from that National Library of Poetry thing years ago and we're just gonna pretend that never happened, okay?) So I'm going to be in print and that has me squeeing like a schoolgirl. :P

Secondly, I've FINALLY finished the first draft MS for Unconventional, so I should be able to do rewrites in the next couple days and end it in. Wheee!

So, yes. Excited flaily-hands dance! *hee*

I need help! *bats eyes prettily*

And no, I don't mean mental help. This time. :P

See, I've been thinking about this for a while now and I'm almost sure I want to do it. The only question is how and when and with whom... and how much is it going to cost me.

Okay, that sounds a little weird, so I guess I should explain.

I have a number of novels out, as I'm sure most of you know. What you might not know is that the print rights on most of them have reverted to me while the electronic rights are still entailed with one of my publishers. Now, there's nothing wrong with that. The publisher doesn't have any obligation to print my books and that's fine. I understood that going in.

Thing is, I go to a fair number of events and such each year at which I try to promo my work. I do the occasional panel and hand out promo stuff and so on. However, I'm sort of thinking that it would be good for me to have some print books to sell. Like... maybe people would buy something that interested them when it was right there in front of them. It seems more likely than the notion that they might remember to go looking for something online days later, right?

So here's the thing.

I have NO idea of what U.S. based printers/self-pubs/whatevers are legitimate or do good work. I don't know how much $$ is reasonable when I'm not looking for any sort of full service package or whatever. I mean, the editing is done (though I'll likely tweak a bit before printing). I'll need cover art of some variety and I suppose I'll need ISBN numbers and bar codes (maybe... if I want to try to get the books into bookstores. Not sure I'd need them in order to sell my books in print via my own website or something... *ponders*).

Basically, I'm hoping someone here on my flist will have some knowledge in this area and be able to advise me or at least point me in the right direction (or point me away from the wrong one, which is just as important).

So. Any words of wisdom? Is this even a viable idea? Have any of you done this before, and if so, was it worth it?

I'd really appreciate any responses here, people. I'm entirely clueless. :(


Me no likeee plague!

Feel like the pile of poo on toast after it got squished into the floor then scraped back up.

Went to drug store where they said "it doesn't matter which meds you buy, you're still gonna feel like this cuz they're all the same" (me, paraphrasing).

Got food but don't want it. And I feel dehydrated even though I'm drinking ass-loads of water and orange juice. *grumbles*

Can't manage more than 45 minutes sleep before that whiole "I need to breath" thing comes up again, so I'm a little loopy and bleary-eyed.

That whole little bit dead option from yesterday? I vote that. Now, please? (Thanks everyone who replied yesterday. I can't focus enough to respond now bit I will.)



Woke up yesterday feeling ucky and that's the best I've felt since.

Not sure what happened, but I'm coughing, congested, sinuses funky... feel hot and cold (often at the same time) and my throat hurts almost as much as my head.

Add to all that the fact that I'm not sleeping much, if at all, because if I lie down I can't breathe and if I sit up, I can't sleep, and it's just a recipe for a funtastic Tis!

Can I please either get better now or, you know... die? Just a little dead would be fine.


Well, it's after midnight here, and if the old legend that whatever you're doing at the stroke of midnight, NYE, is what you'll be doing for the next year has any credence at all, then I'll apparently be writing an awful lot this year. *hee*

I managed another 2,600-ish words on the third and final story of the Conventional series and I'm very happy about that, so yeah. I can handle being writing like a crazy person for the next year! *hee*

I'd love to post one of those flashy, glittery 'Happy New Year' things here but I don't know where to find them or how to put them up, so... Happy New Year, everyone!!!

I hope it's joyous and glorious and brings each and every one of you only good things!

As for myself, I had a truly insane number of stories published this past year, which only makes sense since I haven't been able to find a job since before LAST New Year's. I've been channeling all that frustration into writing, I suppose.

SO. My goal for the New Year is to write less. Not because I WANT to write less but because I'm hoping that I'll be working soon and thus will have less time for the writing.

Another goal is to have my first book for Total-E-bound sell well enough that they want to publish the second... and hopefully the third (yes, I wrote what is a trilogy, so far). This means I need to pimp it and do promo and I have NO idea of how to accomplish that. If any of you have advice or tips, my darling flisters, they would be very appreciated. *grins*

I'm also determined to quit smoking because it's a filthy-dirty habit. This is not a resolution, but something I'd like to do in the coming year. OH, and start exercising because my ass is getting WAY too big for my standard "I have a lush bottom" line to work anymore. LOL

So that's it. My last 2009-centric post.

Hope all of you (dependent upon where you are) have had, are having, or will have wonderful New Year's Eves. And I hope 2010 brings each and every one of you everything you want, need and deserve.

Much love (as sappy as that may be)...

Cowboy 3

Things that squick/annoy me...

... in m/m stories.

Okay, so everyone reading this likely knows what I read (and write), so it should come as no shock to anyone that I have certain things that just irk me or make me go "ewwwwwwww" when reading them.

I'm putting this under a cut because I feel like it. *grins*

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Okay, yes. I'm sort of particular. I know this about me. But these are some of the things that bug me and drag me from being sunk within a story.

How about you, my trusty flisters? What irks/squicks you, and why? *grins*

Oh, and Happy New Year, all! I hope it's joyous for each and every one of you!